Thursday, April 22, 2010

Encourage Yourself...and Each Other


In the Black community, the "crabs in a barrel" concept is nothing foreign to us...unfortunately. The practice of tearing each other down to bring ourselves up has been a part of our culture for centuries. It is so easy to talk about someone else in hopes of bringing up your own self esteem. This concept even goes to our hair. While living in Florida, I received a few "looks" (akin to "Why is she wearing her hair like that?") from other black people after I went natural and had my 'fro; it took my own father to get used to my new look, not to mention my 7 year old cousin that lives in South Carolina who said "I don't like your hair like that" when she saw me when I went home for a visit. After my move to DC, where there are many more women who are natural, I felt more comfortable in my choice. Now, my mother raised me to not let what people say or what they think about me to affect me. She always told me to hold my head high and to believe in myself. Wouldn't it be amazing if all women taught their daughters, nieces, sisters, and friends to believe in themselves no matter what? We need to teach our girls to believe that they are beautiful, no matter how short their hair, how much money they make, or where they live. I'm sure that most of us have experienced some form of childhood torture, directed at us or not, ranging from "You're too black", "Your hair is nappy", or "You're stupid", among others. I think that if girls were taught at a young age that they were beautiful and worthy, they would feel comfortable being their natural selves. Now, don't get me wrong-I'm not saying that if all Black women felt beautiful they would be natural. I'm just saying that if we were encouraged as little girls we would feel beautiful no matter what.
I know I was kinda all over the place with this post, but as someone who has worked with middle school and high school aged girls for years, I felt like this was something important to discuss. So, I challenge all of you to encourage that young girl you see at church, where you volunteer, or even that girl that lives in your neighborhood. If she hears it enough, she may start believing it...

1 comment:

  1. I concur! Great post. DC is kind of a black bubble (like atlanta) where there are so many black people and other minorities that you can kind of be yourself (your own manifestation of african american or whatever other group). It's always a little shocking to me when I visit places that aren't as cosmopolitan. Nice blog. Respect.

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